Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M - Season 6 Episode 6

I continue staring at my brother. It’s suddenly hitting me that I’ve been so lost with what’s happening in my life that I failed to notice anyone else around me.

That’s the thing with depression. You fail to see the sufferings of others because you are too focused on yourself. I’ve let life pass me by these past few years. I haven’t been involved with those around me. In fact, I’ve pulled everyone’s focus on me because they were so worried about my mental health.

I didn’t stop to think about what mom was going through with her own guilt. I didn’t stop to think about Travis, who was carrying the weight of his own sins plus that of the company. I didn’t stop to think about anyone but myself.

I feel terrible when I think of all those things. All the things I have put them through. The worry, the anguish, the pain. I know I wouldn’t want to see any of them in the state I was in. It would be painful knowing that I can’t really help them because they refuse to be helped. I understand that, so I understand what it must be like dealing with myself.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, running my hand through my hair.

I really need to book an appointment at the salon. I don’t remember the last time I had my hair trimmed or even taken care of. It was a bit dry and the split ends were crazy.

“About what?” Travis asks, briefly looking at me before focusing on the road again.

“For what I’ve put both you and mom through these past two years. I’ve been so selfish, thinking only about myself and my pain. I was so blinded by my guilt that I failed to see what I was putting you two through.”

I had twisted my body in my seat so that I could be able to address both of them. Mom leans forward and pulls my hand into hers. It’s warm and comforting. Her warmth eases something inside me.

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“You don’t have to apologize, Emma. We will always be there for you no matter what,” she says, her eyes conveying her love for me.

Her words break and mend my heart at the same time. There is just something about being surrounded by your family. By their love. I know it’s too late, but I wish that Ava had this when she was married to Rowan. That she had this kind of support when he broke her heart over and over again. Maybe it would have helped heal some of her wounds.

It’s too late now, and what’s done is done. I don’t like what she went through, but everything that happened, happened the way it was supposed to happen. What matters is that we are there for her moving forward. We lost the meaning of family when it came to her. It’s time for them to fix that.

“Mom is right. You are family, Emma. We will always be there for you, no matter what. You don’t have to apologize for what you’ve been going through. We all have our burdens, and we deal with our shit in different ways. What matters is that you are getting better. You are starting to live again.”

I blink my eyes rapidly, trying to blink back the tears that threatened to fall. I give him a watery smile as I close my eyes to try and get my emotions under control.

When I feel more in control, I open them. “How is Scarlet?”

Travis looks surprised at my question. He can’t hide the fact that I’ve shocked him by asking about his long-term girlfriend. I wasn’t welcoming to her because, one, she was always provoking me, and two, she was best friends with Ava, and at that time, I hated Ava.

It took me a while to realize that her provocations were spot on. She wasn’t really provoking me, just telling me the truth I didn’t want to hear.

“She’s well,” he says after the shock fades.

“I know we have had our ups and downs, especially after I came back, because of Ava, but I’d like to fix that. I’d like to get to know my future sister-in-law.”

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I can see how his eyes widen, even though he’s focused on the road ahead of us. This time I chuckle, unable to push it down any longer.

“S-Sure. I know she’d be happy with that,” he stammers the word.

“Are you sure she’d be happy?” I ask skeptically, doubt marring my voice.

He laughs a bit, his voice echoing in the car. “You’ll grow on her. She isn’t that bad and she doesn’t hold grudges’

My lips press in a thin line. I’m doubtful but I am willing to try. I’ll have to take his word for it.

Mom’s head pops between us. “This is what I want. To see my family united. It’s such a great feeling.*

Her voice is beaming with happiness and excitement. It’s so contagious that Travis and I end up smiling. Grinning from ear to ear.

“And hopefully Ava can join the folds once again,” I add, my smile still in place.

“Amen to that,” mom says.

“Are you ready?” Travis asks after we are quiet for a while, everyone just basking in the peace that surrounded us. “Why do you ask?”

“Because we are here.”

I swivel my head, almost snapping my neck in the process. I look through the windows only to realize that we were at Ava’s previous house.

Yeah, I thought I was over my nervousness, but now it’s back ten folds and the peace I felt only moments ago flies out the window.